It has been an extremely hectic week at work. Our team is running into all sorts of problems in our project, which is at the really final stage of implementation. The sites are putting all their resources in setting up the system, and the system is going live early October.

These past two years working in big corporations has taught me some really valuable lessons, most of the times the experience taught me how NOT to do things instead of how to do things the right way. Ironic but sadly all true. Mike told me and I have realized that things are that way in any big corporations. It's just fact of life, there is simply no way around it. I used to fight bureaucracy furiously and make my voice heard, however I'm getting very tire mentally of dealing with these stuff that sometimes I feel like I do not have time to do my real work after all the time spend trying to cover my own butt.

I made a sarcastic joke to Michelle, who I admire for her intelligence and perseverance. "Michelle, I wish I have two brains. One to deal with all the problems and technical challenges, the other just to deal with all the politics and other BS."

I pride myself in my ability to solve problems, but not in my ability to make excuses and make eloquent speech to cover my butt. The real challenges we faced is that we have some data integrity problems, and technically it's very difficult to have a painless fix. However to my boss and any higher ups in the organization, the real challenge is not finding a solution to a real problem, but how to find an excuse and prepare for a meeting to explain what happen and somehow make it sound like we don't have any responsibility of what caused the problem. It's no accident that these people survived for so many years in this corporate world, it's an absolutely eye-opener for me to see how well they cover their butts. Mike was playing the devil's advocate as the head of committee that asks the tough questions, and Cheryl was giving very good answers. (With as little as she know technically, it's amazing how she could phrase it and sound like she designed the system.) Looking at BS master at work is funny but worthwhile. :)

After the BS preparation session, it's already eight PM on Friday night. I went straight home knowing full well that we never have a chance to develop a solution to this problem. Since Friday is basically a butt-covering meetings one after another.

I got up unusually early Saturday morning. For some weird reasons, I have figured out how I should approach and solve this problem in my sleep. It really feels like I need a long break from work, I believe I'm too dedicated to my work that all these different ideas and thoughts occupied the tiny little fraction of my free mind.

I got to my office early and of course the building is empty. I'm the only one working today it seems. I took a good sip of my morning cold water, and really enjoy the quietness of the usually busy building. Feeling like the master of the building, I said to myself there is no way I would fail at getting a solution to this stupid problem that ruined my weekend. It's sad but true that I feel much clearer headed when there is peace and quiet, and I have to work in the weekends to get anything done since during the week day we spent too much time dealing with politics. What we usually do is talk about the problems instead of actually doing something about it. It reminds me the frequently used phrase by the communist leaders "for this problem, let is talk about it."

With Antonio Vivaldi's four season playing in the background, I dug in and explore the extend of the problem in the data, and developed the least damaging way of fixing the problem. I like to listen to classical music because with a soundscape of calmness and serenity, that put me in a very focused and relaxing mood. It frees my mind of any distractions and complicated issues, and allows me to focus all my attention on the problem at hand.

I happily sent off an email to my boss and my co-worker, declaring victory and explain how we could resolve those issues. I begged Mike to put the solution together in a document and finish all the paperwork. Even though I have getting a lot better in writing documentations and taking care of legal requirements, however I clearly feel the need of a second brain, since I don't have a second brain I entrust my work to Mike's brain.

Whenever our team has a problem, one question that always pop into my mind is what are they going to do without me? I always like to imagine scenario where certain conditions are no true and what would have been the outcome. Such as what if we don't have another week, what if they did not hire me at the first place and without my technical expertise how are they going to begin looking into the problem, let alone finding a solution. Last time when I'm the one that is executing the "impossible" plan, I did it in a day and I know for a fact the last time they have to worked over the weekend (both Saturday and Sunday) to get it done. I'm often confused as to why the huge disparity between individual ability.

Although my weekend is ruined, I do feel happy about my ability to solve problem under pressure. Just a work ethic and sense of responsibility and pride in the work that we do that leave me with a very satisfying feeling.